Morenita Ramblings

   I’m not crazy or scary obsessed, but I do have an immense deep love & respect for Christina Aguilera. I don’t think any other pop mainstream artist has ever helped me as much as she has. Her voice nurtures my soul. It is unfortunate that she has such a shitty management team that doesn’t know how to successfully promote her music. She deserves to have so much more recognition. She reinvents herself with every new album. She is not afraid to take risks. So many artists kind of just stay in the same route, not her.

    Many people tell me they don’t like her attitude, or criticize her image, etc. Well, I personally love how real she is. She’s never pretended to be a sweet good girl. So what’s the big deal? Not all of us are saints. That’s what makes us different & isn’t that what we all are always preaching about? How we’re all different & blah blah. I don’t care if she’s a diva, bitch, maneater, whatever. Just sing to me, sexy baby. Sing. -MY QUEEN.

    I always feel like I always have to come to her defense cause she [her music, her beautiful beautiful voice] was always there for me. It’s been said many times before & probably sounds corny by now, but Christina Aguilera never let me feel alone. As far as her image goes.. I’m so sorry to say that she looks better than most of us ever will. “Fat” or “skinny”. She is quite beautiful. Maybe she wears certain outfits that people don’t think is flattering, but even if she wore the most flattering ensemble ever, someone would still say something negative about her. Why? Because she is comfortable in her skin. She is truly comfortable with who she is. And that’s something people just can’t stand.

    Go on, girl. You light up the sky & many lives.

Christina Aguilera - Light Up The Sky (Full HQ) (by whenulookmeontheline)

What is it about this song that gets everyone singing along & feeling good ? :]

The Strokes - Someday (by EAJ1523)

Great friend made this for me many moons ago. (Taken with Instagram)

with hip hop all over again. <3 Hard, too.

just finished reading “Chopsticks” written by Jessica Anthony with [AMAZING, BEAUTIFUL] photography by Rodrigo Corral. —You should all “read” it. I felt like I was right by them & peeking into private moments. 

I received a text from a friend that I’ve loved [as in LOVE love. That crazy love where you move mountains just to see them. -well, loved him on & off throughout the years] today. It was so sweet & I thought to myself; why can’t he just see how much I love him? Why can’t we just be together? Why why why.

It’s a cycle. A new love interest comes in his life & it stings; it shatters my hope. I cry a little, feel sorry for myself for one or two days & then accept it all over again. I don’t know how it’s possible to be this way, but I am. I’m not as crazy about him as I used to be [at least I’ve convinced myself I’m not].

It’s kind of sad, to be honest. I try to remember what my feelings felt like & I can’t totally recall them anymore. I don’t want to read stuff I wrote when I was high on the possibility [more like THOUGHT/wish] of one day ending up with him. -It’ll just depress me. It was nice though. To be so loving like that. 

My only regret is not telling him when I felt it. When I felt like I was going to pop from holding all my love inside. Squishing, twirling it all inside me. Now what good did that do? Keeping it all to myself? -not a damn thing. It’s been said time & time again; but.. if you love someone & can’t live w/out them, you gotta tell them.

Now; I’m just awaiting the next cycle where I fall head over heels for him again. Cause I know it’s bound to happen. -Maybe next time; I’ll be more mature & confess. & then make out like teenagers.

In the meanwhile, I’ll just.. be. Keep learning about myself, the world.

It’s Thanksgiving. -So conflicted about this “holiday”. I’m usually pretty good about appreciating stuff in life; I don’t need a day to remind me. So Thanksgiving is like “whatevers” to me. I just like & celebrate the parts where I can hang out with my loved ones. I pretty much will use any excuse to hang out with people I love cause I can’t get enough of them <3 —even if they all end up arguing & fighting lol -Hoping for a peaceful get together.

We’ll be going to my older brothers house this year & I am excited, but I will miss our usual meal. I’m sure my brother & sis-in-law will keep it very traditional. Which is cool, but I’m so used to my Mom’s Turkey covered in red chile sauce, served with arroz, beans & potato salad! LOL

Anyway. Hope you all have a great day w/your family & loved ones.

You ever care about someone a lot & kind of don’t know them all that well? I do. I care about someone & although they’ve kinda done me dirty in the past, I still.. care.

Don’t know why. -kinda don’t care to know why. I just do. & that’s wonderfully confusing, but I embrace it.

-yep.

I like a boy. Nothing serious. It’s just there, like a funny little nervous feeling. Tickling me. How can you NOT like someone like that? He should know how wonderful he is, & what an amazing man he could turn out to be. I bet he’d be kind of taken aback if he knew how much I fancy him. Maybe he knows, I doubt it though.

They always say to let people know how you feel, but no thanks. I just.. think I’m attracted to people’s dark side. Kinda wanna save them. Although I need a whole lot saving myself; ha. Yea, I like him & I’d like to know why.. his eyes are so so far & lost sometimes. I want to be there.